Guilt with a capital G

The other day I was driving to my parents house to have a weekly lunch with them. Isn't it funny how you can be driving and your mind wonders onto the most trival things that end up creating a very profound thought in yourself. So as I drive by another obsessive billboard trying to sell me a hamburger an old conversation I had with someone long ago manifests itself. "You know Ryan I think it is interesting how you have gone so churchy and I have gone the total opposite more troublesome route." was what she said to me after I hadn't seen her in over 5 years. This came out of the mouth of a girl that was a childhood friend who moved away and I barely talked to in years. Well she came into town one weekend and we descided to get together. Needless to say she had really changed and as you can see how she thought about me and herself. This sentense just sat in my mind for a good couple of minutes til I realized what God was saying to me. Humanity knows they are doing the wrong thing talk about it constantly but still are unwilling to change. Why? One word comes to mind GUILT. How many of us have done something wrong, have sinned? EVERYBODY! and what comes with sinning, guilt. I wonder if have the time what causes us to sin again and again and again is not that God doesn't forgive us (because he does) but that we lack in forgiving ourselves. Which ultimately leads to this view of God as a judge and jury that has a handbook of rules and if you break them you are thrown away like a rage doll. This seems to be the view of most of the world and even christians. How do we come back to the point of seeing that Jesus' came to set us free not to condem us. He tells us this in the Bible. Guilt plagues me dayly and dayly I have to realize that Jesus died for my sins and the sins of the world to set us free. Know I must forgive myself and love who God has made me to be. I have lost my train of thought so if this is lost any real sense forgive me. Hopefully more later.